How They Don’t Publish Me
Of
course we liked that one best.
It screamed without being needy.
It made its point and walked away and
didn't follow us into the shower.
It was art enough not to be just blood
on someone else's hands. You should
develop that more. It had the tone
of someone who almost believed what
he was saying but the mention of magic
seemed childish. You need to love someone
and slowly unravel. A view of mountains.
What's wrong with allegory?
The ending seemed tacked on. Take a break.
A better backstory minus that grating noise
and it might have changed our minds.
The conversation had too many volume bars,
preferably use more Greek gods.
Tim Hurley's poems have appeared in California Quarterly and Sawbuck, and
are forthcoming in Argestes and the Cherry Blossom Review. His first book,
The Best Part of Being Broken, is out to publishers.